I've been looking around at things I can’t reach and im trying to figure out why? Ever have someone so significant in your life put you down so often for so long that eventually you start to believe it? Ever have just one person cause so much damage to your oh so happy oh so perfect lifestyle? What does it take to fix a mess that one person made? How do you trust, love, hope and reach for the impossible again? i had one person whom i loved so much build me up and tear me down to the floor. It took one person to make me question where my heart is? He called me every terrible name in the book he put me down so bad that he actually convinced me and made me believe i was a bad person when deep down i know myself best. Telling me I'm nothing, that she better ( when i know she is not). Im not looking to be that overdramatic girl who is trying to get over a breakup. But he broke me down. Ok maybe this blog is a pathetic one but right now im trying to figure out how to move on without feeling heartache. Him i'm over the heartache just takes a longer time to leave my side. Hate may be a strong word but i hate him. i hate someone i loved. They ripped me down and left the pieces on the floor. i will build them up but in the process things are passing me by like Mr. amazing, opportunities for risk, excitement. But I'm not ready to throw my caution to the wind, or let Mr. amazing in. I don't want to miss out and i guess when something is meant to be it will just hit me on its on and i will just know. I won't feel my past and i won't feel heartache... it will just feel right... and if tomorrow never comes i know ill regret.
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